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Don’t Feel Guilty During The Holidays!

Holidays are stressful!  Holidays are a mom’s nightmare sometimes. There can be a lot of pressure during the holidays to be, do, and have things PERFECT!  The thing is, everyone has their idea of what merriment looks like and the best way to spend the holiday season. This year is different than all Christmases prior. There is a pandemic going on, and we have to make tough decisions for our family. 

Ultimately, it’s essential to choose what’s best for your family during the holidays and let go of any guilt along the way. It might feel uncomfortable, but if you keep your focus positive, you can assert yourself without too much fallout. If you are staying home for the holiday’s WOOHOO, and if you are not, please wear those masks plus keep 6 feet apart- I know not hugging will be hard! 

We are staying home even though we were supposed to go to my mom’s this year- spend a week in snow and being spoiled but not going to happen! But it is best for my family, and as much as the kids and grandma are disappointed, I will not feel guilty putting their health first! 

If you feel the GUILT will get the best of you- don’t let it!  Here are some ways to help you with the guilt. 

Be confident about what is best for the family!

One of the keys to choosing what’s best for your family without feeling guilty is knowing for sure what’s best. When you are clear on what you want and need, it’s easier to be confident about it. Any kind of travel now is just crazy! 

So make the most of it by planning ZOOM calls with everyone in the family. Getting everyone on a call would be so much fun.  You can sing carols, even open presents, tell stories, just have fun!  Knowing that your family should stay put can help you make a clear decision, stick to it, and not feel guilty about it. 

Communicate and Come Up With A Plan

Just because you are home doesn’t mean it can’t be fun.  Talk to everyone and come up with a plan!  Letting people know what your plans are clearly and concisely will help them adapt and make their plans. Just let everyone know the plan and allow them to contribute as well. Ask the kids what they want to do during the holiday, and if it’s not so crazy, make it happen.  My daughter wants to bake, watch Christmas movies in matching pajamas- we are going to make that happen. 

Now you might have family members who might not understand your decision to stay home, and that is OK!  They have their own opinions, and we have to respect that. That is when communication is the key. It might be vital for you to clarify why you choose whatever it is for your family’s holiday. Make sure to explain with confidence and then let it go. Not everyone will understand your plan or endorse it, but they will respect it if you set healthy limits and refuse to negotiate. 

Don’t Feel Bad For Putting Your Family First! 

You can’t please all the people all the time. Some people are unable or unwilling to give others the grace and freedom to do what’s best for them. It’s ok if someone is upset with your decision as long as you have made things clear, concise, and mature with your communication. Ultimately, you can’t control other people’s reactions; you can only control your own.  We are all human and have feelings, so yes, this year might be difficult for some family members.  

If you need to reduce your stress this season by creating a holiday plan that’s perfect for your family but might ruffle some feathers, it’s essential to put your family first and refuse to feel guilty. Healthy people will understand, and unhealthy people won’t. That’s ok. Doing what’s best for your family is nothing to be afraid of and especially this year. 

So take a deep breath and know doing what is best for your family is nothing to feel guilty about, period.  Just get creative and have fun!

Please leave a comment and let us know how your family is going to celebrate this year?  If you are not staying at home, just be safe and the same thing- as long as you keep your family safe, no guilt is needed. 

1 comment

  1. You are right. The holidays are stressful already and this year even more so. We will be staying at home also.


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