As a mom to an almost two-year-old and a brand-new newborn, I’ve realized how common it is for people to greet this season with warnings. You hear things like, “Just wait until you get no sleep,” or “Just wait until your toddler gets jealous,” or “Just wait, you’re going to be so overwhelmed.” It’s almost like people can’t help but frame motherhood in the hardest light possible. But somewhere along the way, I realized that shifting my mindset completely changed how I experienced these early days.

Because yes, people say, “Just wait until you’re exhausted,” but I’ve found myself thinking instead: Just wait until you’re holding your newborn in the stillness of the night and feel that quiet, indescribable wonder. People say, “Just wait until your toddler acts out,” but what about, Just wait until they meet their sibling for the first time and your heart feels fuller than you knew it could? And when people warn, “Just wait, two kids will overwhelm you,” I’ve learned to replace it with, Just wait until your home suddenly feels complete in a way you weren’t expecting.

Changing the “just waits” from fear to gratitude matters, because it shifts the entire tone of your day. It helps you see the moments you’ll someday ache to relive.   The tiny newborn stretches, the toddler kisses, the loud, messy, love-filled days that make up a childhood. These are the best days of my life, and I don’t want to miss them because someone else taught me to expect the worst. When I’m old and looking back, it won’t be the hard moments I long for, it will be these small, fleeting, beautiful ones happening right now.