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No is NOT a Bad Word #MBPWELLNESS21

Don’t be afraid to say it! No is not a bad word! You are allowed to say it. Don’t be afraid of a cute little two-letter word! 

Not everyone has our best intentions in mind. They are sometimes asking us or telling us to do something not because they know it will better our being or cultivate our spirit, but they want something for themselves. Only you can know what is best for you, best for your mental health, what fits your schedule, and what cultivates your spirit! We have to be our own advocates!

“No.” is a complete sentence and a complete answer. Give yourself that freedom! You are not required to explain why your answer is no. It is not your job to please someone else at your own expense.

It took me a long time to learn this. There were so many times when my younger self said yes to please the person asking whatever they were asking. I would then be anxious about whatever it was and dread doing it. Is that really how I want to show up for something I said yes to?

Somewhere around my mid-thirties, I realized that this was a detriment to my mental health. I began setting boundaries for myself in regards to my time and how I spend it and learning the inexplicable joy of that two-letter word, “No”. It is so freeing to know I am only responsible for myself and I do not have to agree to things that do not enrich my life. I can say no without feeling like I have to explain it to anyone. It is my decision what I partake in.

Maybe your friends and family ask you to do something because they miss you, want to include you, they think you’ll enjoy the activity, etc. Of course, we desire to say yes because we want to spend time with them and love them. However, it is also okay if you don’t want their company at the time they ask. You know your schedule and when you want to be around others or when you need alone time. Give yourself the freedom to make a choice for your well-being. They should understand because they love you too.

Casey Denney at The Odyssey Online says, “You know when you need downtime, you know when you need to rest, and, know this: you will not be able to give anything to that person, you will not be able to be a joy to them, and it will not be good for your relationship if you are empty, worn out, and in need of some self-time. You can’t fill someone else while you are run-down, burnt out, and this close to being empty.”

Take care of your mental health. Say yes to things that enrich your life and cultivate your spirit. Helping others, spending time with others, and time for yourself are all important. Be free to say no when you need to!

Give others the freedom to say it as well. It is not the end of the world to be told no. We all need "us" time, so respect another's no.

Yes is beautiful when we are agreeing to something that we want and know is right for us. Confidently go forth with the power of:

Do you struggle with saying NO? 

How do you take care to refill your tank?


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