It has been too long since both of my children have been asleep in their rooms.  E is doing his military training, but J was able to come home to celebrate her dad's 40th birthday.   I am sitting here teary-eyed because they ran to the gym and I know she will take a shower when she gets back.  I am not crying because she needs to shower,  but years ago she used to need my help washing her hair.  She doesn't need that help anymore  Now she is an adult and will be moving on to her own military career.  When did all these moments turn into distant memories?

This past week has been really good for me because with neither of my babies living at home I was struggling.  I have been home from work for 4 long months and I have always been a working mother.  Now, I have no work and no one to mother.  It is the weirdest feeling and something that affects my emotions drastically.
 


I loved every minute of the visit with J, but as sad as I was to see her leave and go home, I was reminded of a photo I took of both kids when they were small.  They need to spread their wings.  Now is their time to soar and learn about life without being influenced by us.  It is our time to realize that they learned every day growing up and they will make their own decisions based on that.  They are strong and they are smart and have planned their own lives.  This is what we want for our children.  The home will always be home for them, but to me, it will be a visit as they will have their own homes and maybe one day their own families.     

I had doubts throughout child-rearing.  I feared that I was doing the wrong thing all the time.  The truth is, as I watch them as adults I can see decisions they make or made are in part because of how they were raised.  I have two well-rounded kids that are now embarking on a path for their future... one that is earned and not given to them.  It is moments like these that make me realize that I did just fine.  So, if you are struggling with doing the "right" thing just know that every child is different just as every parent is.  Let them be who they want to be and you will be surprised how you influence them later in life.