How to Support a Spouse Going Through a Difficult Time


There’s nothing worse than seeing your spouse going through a rough time in their lives. Maybe they lost a parent, got fired from a job, was injured in a car accident, or is suffering from a physical or mental health problem. Whatever happened, you can see the pain in their eyes and it’s killing you. You want to do something to help, but their distance, denial, or confusing behaviors make it hard for you to know just how.


Educate Yourself

It is often best to help your spouse by having a complete understanding of what they’re going through and the most effective solutions for recovering. Do some research online or talk to others who have gone through a similar situation as your spouse to find out the best route to take. For example, if your spouse was struggling with substance abuse as a result of losing his job, look into signs of addiction, and ways to recover like counseling or enrolling in rehab like Hotel California By the Sea Cincinnati.

Respect Their Space

As much as you might want to surround your spouse with your love and presence, sometimes they just need to be left alone. If you try to approach them, talk to them, or spend time with them and they ask you to leave them alone, respect their space. Trying to engage them while they’re overly emotional could spark an argument which only compounds the tension between you. Simply let them know that you are there whenever they need you.

Listen Without Judgment

When your spouse does want to open up to you, be there to listen to them. Allow them to do most of the talking and just listen. No matter what is said or how it makes you feel, try not to project your feelings into the mix or judge them. Just be a source of release for your partner and if asked, then provide input and/or advice.

Make Sure They Eat

When a person is going through a difficult time in their lives, they can get in such a dark place that they stop doing things they need like eating. Not eating, however, can cause weight issues, cognitive problems, and other health complications down the line. Make sure that you prepare meals for your spouse (even if they’re small) and encourage them to put something on their stomachs.

Give Them Encouragement

There’s nothing like encouragement from your significant other to boost your spirits. Without overdoing it, find kind ways to let your spouse know you believe in them and that they will get through this. Send them inspirational text messages, remind them of past trials they overcame, or even share your own experiences if you can relate. It may take time for it to resonate, but they do appreciate it.

Create a Game Plan

When your spouse starts to come around show them you’re in their corner by helping them to come up with a game plan for the future. Whether it’s creating a meal plan, exercise routine, career plan, or simply helping them to decide which counselor or rehab they’re going to go to for treatment, they’ll appreciate having you there to support them.

Take Care of You

Here is a big tip that many spouses forget. Though it is difficult to see your spouse go through such tough times you’re no good to them if you stop taking care of you. Make sure that you’re still eating, exercising, getting enough sleep, and continuing your daily routines. You should also find time to do things that you enjoy so that you don’t become depressed or resentful of your spouse. This may even encourage them to want to get out and do things again. If necessary, consider enrolling in counseling yourself if you are suddenly feeling down or are also impacted by the traumatic experience your spouse went through.

Though love is the foundation and happiness is the hope, yet the strength of a marriage is often tested when things are going wrong. From financial troubles and loss to a bad medical diagnosis to mental illness, there are so many things that happen in life that can send them spiraling downhill. Keep hope alive and try the suggestions listed above. It may take time, but eventually, it will be your love and support that helps to pull them through.

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