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Addressing Disappointment with your Teens

There are times when you feel very disconnected with your children as a parent.  The teenage years are the hardest because they struggle to assert their independence and you are still seeing them as a child.  It is during this time that the arguing and yelling seem to never want to end.  How do you cope?  How do you address feeling disappointment in behavior, actions, or a combination of the two when you don't want to discourage your children?  
 It would be dishonest to say that somethings my children have done have not disappointed me.  I cannot say I have been disappointed in them but more so their actions or in-actions for how they may handle a situation.  I have tried the lectures, the explaining of my feelings, and of course the grounding from outings or activities but have found no real results in changes.  Am I asking too much?  Are my expectations too high?  If you find yourself asking these same questions I am here to tell you that you are not.  It is our job to raise children to be productive members of society, but it is not our job to prevent them from learning by experience.  No one is perfect and sometimes children will test their limits just so they understand their boundaries.

Be the person that listens without judging.  Be the voice of reason and experience but do not force your views on them.  Support them when they are sad, angry, or even happy no matter what your personal views are.  By keeping an open relationship your advice will mean so much more to them.

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