Happy Monday! I have to admit, I have been feeling sort of stuck lately. Exhausted, run down, stressed, you name it, I have felt it in the past five months. So many things in my life have changed over the course of the past year. I had another baby, so that dramatically changed our family dynamic. Our best friends moved away over the summer, and now there's a void in our social life. Hubby is working more than ever- teaching college, and taking lots of musical gigs on weekends and evenings. I took on new contract work, which is awesome, but I am struggling to find the time to keep up with it all.
I don't know the meaning of the phrase 'down time,' or the meaning of the word 'relaxed.' I imagine that you may be in the same boat- you're tired, overworked, never thanked. This morning, as I washed the dishes and unloaded the dishwasher, I placed Baby S in her swing, and put 'Broken Vessels' by Hillsong on Spotify. As I listened to the words, I felt like God was pouring a lullaby into my soul. I picked my sweet girl up, and I just sang the words over and over as I held her and looked into her sweet face.
Look, I am a mess, and I know it. The words 'Amazing grace, how sweet the sound that save a wretch like me... I once was lost, but now I'm found, was blind, but now I see' may be old standbys, but they are words that I cling to. What follows these words- 'Oh, I can see the love. I can see the love in Your eyes. Laying Yourself down- raising up the broken to life.' If I stop for just a minute- hit the pause button and stop looking down on myself, yes- I can see the love. The love of Christ is all around. I feel that I don't experience it often enough right now, because I won't let myself become vulnerable. I don't have anything to lose, and neither does anyone else. I only have hope, faith, and the eternal love of God the Father to gain. The next time you're feeling down, look up- look to the highest.